Hey, friend. You doing alright?
Why are we all here, you ask? Isn’t it obvious?
We’re here because we care about you. Your obsession with Fuzzy’s Taco Shop has gotten a little out of control. We know Fuzzy’s Taco Shop can be pretty life altering, but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. And your mother told us you’ve worn your Fuzzy’s t-shirt every day this week? C’mon now.
Here are some signs you are officially a Fuzzy’s Taco Shop addict.
You think about Fuzzy’s Taco Shop all day.
From when you rise in the morning to when your head hits the pillow at night, it’s Fuzzy’s, Fuzzy’s, Fuzzy’s. You talk about it to your coworkers, family and friends constantly. So much so that you’re often asked, “Do you, like, work there or something?”
You plan your day around your Fuzzy’s Taco Shop meal.
You turn down lunch plans with friends unless it’s at Fuzzy’s. It’s a reoccurring event on your work calendar. You carry Fuzzy’s Taco Shop Butt Burnin’ Sauce on you at all times.
You use tacos as a measurement of currency.
You find $6 in your back pocket and immediately think, “I just found three Fuzzy’s tacos in my pocket!”
You start inserting the word “taco” into popular songs.
Whether it’s “I Don’t Want to Taco ‘Bout It” by Rod Stewart or “Pour Some Tacos On Me” by Def Leppard, you’re starting to worry anyone within earshot. You also are a fan of the song “Puttin’ on the Ritz” by ’80s one-hit wonder Taco.
You doodle Fuzzy’s tacos all day long.
You appear to be taking notes in that long meeting but no, you’re just drawing tacos.
You purchase taco-scented air fresheners.
People assume you just had Fuzzy’s Taco Shop to go when they get in your car, but it’s actually an intentional effort on your part.
You take off work for National Taco Day.
Most people call in sick the day after the Super Bowl or July 4th, but you mysteriously “aren’t feeling well” after this special day.
You got a Fuzzy’s Taco Shop tattoo.
We’re flattered you chose our logo over, say, your ex’s name or your favorite football team, but just think about it … that’s all we ask.
Where you move depends on proximity to a Fuzzy’s Taco Shop.
Three bedrooms? Check. Two baths? Check. Great school district? Check. Within 2 miles of Fuzzy’s Taco Shop? Sorry, but we’re gonna have to keep looking.
You name your children after Fuzzy’s Taco Shop menu items.
Look, it’s one thing to name your guinea pig Fuzzy. That actually makes sense. But middle school is tough enough for kids these days without being named “Nacho” or “Jumbo Burrito”.
You sleep on a broken bed that’s shaped like a taco.
Alright you’ve lost your mind a little bit.
You begin to shake when it’s been too long.
Your Fuzzy’s withdrawals are a bit scary. You always carry an EpiPen® filled with queso in case of emergencies.
We’re going to get you through this. Soon you’ll be obsessed with Fuzzy’s Taco Shop in a healthy way—just like the rest of us.
